In Nigerian culture, families often place more focus on preparing girls to be good wives than on teaching boys how to be good husbands. Girls are trained from a young age to be responsible, nurturing, and supportive, with the expectation that they will one day serve their husbands. Boys, on the other hand, are encouraged to be strong, independent, and financially successful, but they are rarely taught the emotional skills needed for a healthy marriage. This unbalanced upbringing is one of the reasons many marriages in Nigeria are struggling or falling apart today.
From childhood, Nigerian girls are often taught to cook, clean, and take care of others, preparing them for their future roles as wives and mothers. While these skills are important, they don’t fully equip girls for the challenges of marriage, which require more than just serving others. Girls need to be taught how to be partners, how to communicate, and how to express their needs and desires.
Meanwhile, boys are taught to be providers and protectors but are rarely shown how to manage emotions, communicate effectively, or share responsibilities in the home. Many boys grow up thinking that their role in marriage is to provide financially while leaving emotional and household duties to their wives. This mindset leads to unhealthy marriages where both partners feel unfulfilled
When boys are not taught how to be emotionally supportive or share the workload in a marriage, it often causes problems in relationships. Women, who have been taught to serve and care for their families, may feel overwhelmed, neglected, or underappreciated. This imbalance often leads to frustration, arguments, and, in some cases, divorce.
Many marriages also suffer because husbands and wives are not equally prepared for the emotional and practical challenges that come with married life. The result is a growing number of broken homes, where both partners struggle to meet each other’s needs.
To solve this issue, Nigerian parents need to change how they raise their children. Both boys and girls should be taught that marriage is a partnership, where both partners share the responsibilities equally. Boys should be taught how to communicate openly, show empathy, and take care of their emotional well-being. They should also learn how to share household chores and support their wives in every aspect of family life.
On the other hand, girls should be taught that their value is not limited to being a “wife material.” While nurturing and caring for others is important, they should also be encouraged to pursue their own goals, express their needs, and expect mutual respect and support in their marriages.
Parents should also teach both boys and girls that being “husband material” and “wife material” is about being emotionally available, responsible, and committed to building a healthy, supportive relationship.
For marriages in Nigeria to thrive, both boys and girls need to be raised with a balanced understanding of what makes a healthy partnership. By teaching boys to be caring and responsible, and girls to value themselves beyond traditional gender roles, Nigerian families can create a generation of couples who are better prepared for marriage.
This shift in parenting will help reduce the number of broken homes and build stronger, healthier marriages in the future. It’s time for Nigerian parents to start preparing both sons and daughters for the realities of partnership, so that love, respect, and equality become the foundation of every marriage.
BY YIRAH, BITRUS, AKAWU
.jpg)
.jpeg)
0 Comments